Consult for divorce in Monmouth County NJ divorce

Some Notes on New Jersey Divorce and Child Custody

Parents who are processing their divorce in New Jersey need to discuss and agree on child custody. Child custody is more than an agreement among the spouses as to whom the child or children will live with. Divorce laws in New Jersey provide that the child’s best welfare must be primary in promulgating child custody decisions.

The parents may firm up a plan on how the children will be nurtured and their needs fulfilled as they grow. They must submit their custody and visitation schedule to the Superior Court for evaluation, which most likely would get a nod when law criteria are satisfied. The New Jersey government provides much freedom for parents to fashion the custody plan for their child.

Besides the basic needs of food, clothing, and shelter, New Jersey divorce statutes consider happiness, security and home environment as among the general factors in making child custody decisions. Other factors that the court takes into account are as follows:

. The parents’ ability to agree, communicate and cooperate in matters relating to the child;

. The parents’ willingness to accept custody and any history of unwillingness to allow parenting time not based on substantiated abuse;

. The interaction and relationship of the child with its parents and siblings;

. The history of domestic violence, if any; the safety of the child and the safety of either parent from physical abuse by the other parent;

. The preference of the child when of sufficient age and capacity to reason so as to form an intelligent decision;

. The needs of the child;

. The stability of the home environment offered;

. The quality and continuity of the child’s education;

. The fitness of the parents;

. The geographical proximity of the parents’ homes;

. The extent and quality of the time spent with the child prior to or subsequent to the separation;

. The parents’ employment responsibilities;

. The age and number of the children. A parent shall not be deemed unfit unless the parents’ conduct has a substantial adverse effect on the child;

Depending on the agreement, parents have the authority to make decisions for and in behalf of their children. Generally, legal custody is an obligation that parents share but a dysfunctional spouse may be inhibited (or may voluntarily default) to take part in this responsibility.

So that there will not be miscommunications and to avoid possible cause of conflicts, both parties must come to an understanding as to what decisions that the parents will make corporately, what decisions are relegated to a specific parent. When they are not in agreement over a decision for the child, parents should have an option or course of action.

The court that oversees the implementation of the New Jersey divorce laws is apt to approve the custody agreement that the parents have willfully and harmoniously designed. If the spouses fail to come up with a common plan, the court will determine it on the primary basis of what is best for the child and the practical factors that were listed earlier.

Jon Stewart The Second Born With An Attitude

American political satirist, television host, and stand up comedian. Known for The Daily Show that puts a satirical slant to news stories

Early Years
Born November 28th 1962, Jon is the younger brother of Lawrence Leibowitz.
Both Jon and Lawrence are the same age during each year so they may be
no more than one year apart. With two different names are they step-brothers from two marriages? The answer is Jon changed his name from Jonathan Stewart Leibowitz to Jon Stewart in 2001. His parents divorced when he was eleven years old and he and his brother were raised by his mother. He has no contact with his father, another possible reason for the name change. The second born does not forgive easily.

Dont Compare Me to My Brother
Larry, his older brother, is presently Chief Operating Officer and member
of the Management Committee, New York Stock Exchange Euronext, Inc.
In fiscal year 2009 Larrys compensation was $1,675,000. As a first born
being part of the establishment and following the rules is usually the case.
A position of power to give orders to others and not money is their personality
trait. A conservative view of life is in keeping with this birth order. Jon, the younger brother, earned 14 million dollars in 2008. As a second born he would use money for the freedom it brings having no one tell him what to do. Money gives the second born independence, he does not use it for power over others. The second born can take a different path than the first born and Jons liberal views show clearly on his show. In college Stewart majored in psychology and played on the soccer team. This is the athletic side of the second born. He has had surgery to repair both a hernia and knee injury attributed to college soccer. The second born can be the bull dog in spirit, they never give up.

Work History
Jon had a series of part-time jobs which included, busboy, puppeteer, bartender and shelf stocker at Woolworths. He was fired at Woolworths after diving into a beanbag chair that crashed into a group of aquariums causing $10,000 damage. Worse yet, it was his older brother that fired him! He got his first television job as a writer for Carolines Comedy Hour. Several other comedy shows followed with some co-hosting roles. When David Letterman left NBC in 1993 Jon was in the running to replace him. It came down to Stewart and Conan OBrian, Stewart lost.

Birth Orders of Talk Show Hosts
The book, Lifes Fingerprint, a study of birth orders and how they affect your path throughout life shows that NBC got it wrong. There have been a number of talk show hosts with the number Two or the Double birth order of a Two/Only. David Letterman a Two/Only, (five years between David and his sister). Jay Leno an Only/Two, (Ten years between Jay and his older brother) and Howard Stern a Two/Only, (Four years between himself and his older sister). We cannot forget Johnny Carson, the most successful talk show host of all time was a second born. Conan OBrian is a third born with a very different personality and we now know how that worked out. In 2002 ABC offered Stewart his own talk show to air after Nightline. He was very interested but ABC gave the show to Jimmy Kimmel, a firstborn. The saying, Always the Bridesmaid never the Bride seems to fit for Jon Stewart.

Dont tell Me What to Do
In college he was briefly a member of a fraternity but left in part because he did not agree with the hazing. Second borns dont like to be told what to do..
In 2005 he appeared on the CNN show Crossfire with the host Tucker Carlson.
The interview did not go well but Stewart would not give ground as he
accused the hosts of being partisan hacks. He said the show failed to inform and educate its viewers. Second borns will stick to their position. In 2005 CNN announced that it was canceling Crossfire.

Who is Your Friend?
People with the same birth order have an uncanny way of finding each other. If you look closely at your friends you will find many times they share your birth order. This was true for Jon while he was going through a series of jobs; he shared an apartment with Anthony Weiner. Anthony, like Stewart, had an older brother giving him the same number Two birth order. Weiner is now a Congressman from New York and the only politician to have received a campaign donation from Stewart.

Birth order is that unconscious unseen force that influences many aspects of our lives. With its understanding we may see that some things dont just happen by chance.

Avoiding the Common Causes of Divorce

Funny and ridiculous as it may seem, but some people will tell you that the main reason why couples divorce is their marriage. Some couples who may have lived together prior to getting married will soon discover that they were better off together as a live-in couple, rather than the married couple that they are now. Strange, but not that difficult to understand.

There is also the misconception that children of divorced parents become better at their own marriages and very seldom end up divorced. The truth is most children who witnessed their parents’ divorce may also end up divorced themselves. Although they may vow not to make the same mistakes their parents have done in the past, some people who are children of divorced parents seem to have developed an apathy towards it, that they no longer find it a threat which needs to be avoided at all costs.

There are many other possible reasons why a couple would end up in divorce, but the most common one seems to be the lack of communication between partners. It is not rare to hear a wife blame her husband for focusing too much on his career, that he spends very little time at home with her and the children. In the same manner, you would often hear some husbands blame their wives for neglecting him and pouring all her time to the children and maybe her career. Yet, all these things can be avoided if the couple has taken the time to sit down together and discuss things in a loving way.

Communication is the binding element in a marriage. Some couples never really master the art of communicating their needs and desires to each other.

One of the most severe causes of divorce is if abuse constantly happens in the relationship. The word “abuse” is so general, and may happen in different ways. It may be verbal abuse, emotional, physical or sexual abuse, or even the abuse of toxic substances such as alcohol and drugs. If one partner is abusive, while the other one simply accepts the abuse, there is a need to consult professional advice, otherwise, this kind of relationship is bound to end in divorce.

Sexual incompatibility and financial issues also rank high among the common causes of divorce. The couple may have different views on sexual intimacy which may result to one partner being dissatisfied with the relationship and possibly end up having an affair. The other most common stressful area in a marriage is the way each partner spends money. People will always have different views when it comes to earning and spending cash, and if the couple has not met a common ground when it comes to finances, then most likely a divorce will happen.

There are other causes of divorce such as when the couple got married too soon. They may suddenly feel that the marriage is too restrictive because they are still very young. Sometimes different views on discipline for children may also be a big factor.

The best way to prevent a marriage from ending up in divorce is to address the problem as soon as it erupts, and not to wait for the time when the damage is too huge to be repaired. Keeping the communication open is the key to avoiding all other causes of divorce, and if couples can just be open to each other, then there will be lesser incidences of divorce.

Boost Self-Esteem During Divorce

If you are someone in the process of or just beginning a divorce, you are probably feeling emotionally lost. This is normal because you can’t guess what is coming down the road and you may never thought you would be in this place. It’s important that you realize you are not alone and almost half of all marriages end in divorce.

Don’t dwell in guilt and blame, you are taking the steps to a better life. If you and your spouse cannot stay married any longer, then you should move on. The focus needs to be on your future as well as your emotional well being. The past needs to be left in the past, for you and your children, if you have any.

So, how do you keep a positive angle, keep up your self esteem when you feel like the world is ending? One way is to smile. Yes, just smile. Practice that in front of the mirror. If you are being victimized by your soon to be ex-spouse, nothing will confuse him or her more if you are always smiling. The fact that you maybe in the middle of a tremendous untruths in the divorce proceeding will make staying positive difficult. You will need to stay on your game in order to defend your name and reputation.

Don’t give up! You have everything you need within. Make sure you wake up each day with this thought, “I am smart and I am valuable.” This is one way to build your self-esteem when going through a divorce. Surround yourself with friends who are positive and understanding, try to have fun and get out. This will recharge you batteries – which you’ll need should you end up in court.

Getting what is rightfully yours may mean you have to fight for it. Visit the library, talk to divorce friends. Get educated and you will be on the right track. Find a lawyer that is recommended by people who have been through a divorce.

When the divorce is final try to move one, it’s the only way to heal. Get ready to focus on your future: buy new clothes, take a min-vacation. Love will come into your life again. You just may realize that you can be on your own and that life is good. Take time to find out who you are and redefine your relationships with your children as a single parent. You will succeed and you will go on to a better future.

Reasons to Update Your Will

A will is a legally binding contract that is widely considered one of the most important documents you will ever sign. The majority of parents with children actually do not have a will and without one you will not be able to allocate your children any benefits. The general consensus is that after death the eldest family member will have control of your estate, however the reality is this will be decided in court and a judge will end up with the final say. Here are three fantastic reasons to update your will.

Relationships

Over the years you may have developed new relationships with people and organisations, such as finding a new partner or becoming a member of a charity or church. You may want to adjust your will to eliminate any old relationships so that they will no longer receive your benefits upon death. Newborns can be listed as beneficiaries and children who have reached adolescents can be listed as executors.

Income and Assets

You may have listed your car, estate or business in your will and these assets may have changed. Even if you have not sold any of these assets, the value has still changed, for instance your car depreciates and your business grows in revenue. As such the insured amount listed on your will is going to be different and a lot of complications can arise when dealing with these matters after death.

Residency

The location where you created your will is governed by state laws. If you have changed location since then, you will need to consult an attorney to find the legitimacy of your will. State laws can be very different from each other and have different qualifying requirements.

The Law

Laws change all the time and you will want to keep up to date with any legislation affecting your will. The best way is to visit an attorney of the state who can help to validate your will for you and inform you of any changes in law.

Yearly Checklist

The best way to keep up to date is to simply have a yearly check up. Law firms specialising in estate battles can review your will and can work with you to successfully create your ideal will. At the end of the financial year is when most changes take place and is the best time to review your estate, assets, income, superannuation and all other elements that fall into your will.

List down a checklist and consider the following 10 points: children, marriage/separation, death of beneficiaries, location changes, circumstantial changes, state laws, taxation law, time since last review, new business and income increase/decrease.

Your will dictates where your assets will go after death and without one a judge will decide for you. This includes ownership of children under the matured age. If you would like to know more or if you are ready to take another look at your will then jump online and search for a law firm that specialises in estate battles.